Today was rough. I slept only a handful of hours, and not consecutively. I woke up to find more sad news in my in-box, and all I really wanted was to stay in bed, nursing my cough and headache. One of the last places I wanted to be was in a classroom setting, trying to inspire impressionable minds to think differently. Nonetheless, I pushed through, albeit weakly. Curiously, I held back the tears, at least until I got to work (maybe being there was the tipping point). Then, in the privacy of my classroom I let go, and down they fell.
It's very difficult to be away from loved ones during challenging times; there's only so much I can do thousands of miles away, making me feel useless in the support category. On top of that, lately I've been feeling especially estranged as I go through my own routine here -the frameworks and resources I tend to rely on are often so irrelevant and serve as a continual reminder of my alien status.
With my focus turned inward as outlined above, you can imagine how burdensome the day appeared. But then! Later, as I was preparing my lesson plans, I was jolted by the realization that while covering the Roman Empire tonight in my middle school history class, we would also discuss Jesus and His crucifixion and resurrection. What a radical concept and such perfectly ordained timing; it was exactly the shock I needed to (once again) realign my focus.
Less of me, more of Him...